Milka—What?

I, for one, didn’t give a single thought to actress/party-girl Lindsay Lohan when I first saw the E-Trade commercial that originally aired during the Super Bowl. And now, thanks to her $100 million lawsuit alleging E-Trade illegally used her name, she’s forever attached to this commercial.

Does anyone else smell a publicity hoax? It’s an absurd lawsuit that has succeeded at getting her name in the news and E-Trade’s commercial shown again and again on television. And this is just the kind of crap the media laps up. Lindsay has already been labeled as a lesbian, a lunatic and a lime-light-loving narcissist. Why should she be phased by being called a “milka-holic?” If anything, that’s the kindest thing she’s been called.

If she owns a copyright on the name “Lindsay,” or has any supplemental rights to its use, why isn’t she suing the hundreds of thousands of parents who’ve opted to give their children this name?

Two years ago I was in a copyright dispute over use of the word BUNCO (or BUNKO), which we wanted to use in the title of my second novel (ultimately called It’s Not Your Mother’s Bridge Club). Prior to publication, my publisher contacted the World Bunco Association, located in southern California, announcing the title (The Bunco Chronicles), which was a story about a group of women who play the popular dice game. He hoped to generate an association with this organization and promote book sales to this target audience. Instead the response he received was to “cease and desist” in the name of copyright infringement.

Leslie Crouch, association president, claimed to hold all rights to the use of this word for many things, including book titles. In spite of my publisher’s and his attorney’s rejection of this claim, we met with her and attempted to negotiate a deal. Turns out she wanted fifty percent of the royalties, which most would agree was almost as absurd as Lindsay Lohan’s price tag. Considering most copyright deals fall between three and ten percent, it all felt like a great big bunco operation.

We soon learned the World Bunco Association only had “supplemental” rights to the word and according to our research (which included conversations with ten different attorneys) Crouch wasn’t entitled to have exclusive use of the word. This doesn’t mean she didn’t have the right to sue if we did use it. And although we believed she wouldn’t win the case, we’d spend far too much in legal fees defending our right to use the word bunco (even if we spelled it with a K). No one but the lawyers would have made a dime off my little bunko novel.

It could have been a win-win situation for the book and the association but everything about the ordeal ended up feeling wrong. So, we changed the name of the book.

Reviews were good but sales were modest at best. My small publisher doesn’t have a big publicity department and I, unfortunately, am not as narcissistic and lime-light-loving as Lindsay Lohan. I haven’t pounded the publicity pavement as much as I should have if I wanted the novel to be a true success.

Damn! Why didn’t I give my alcoholic character (Tara) the name Lindsay? Maybe Lindsay Lohan would have sued me for $100 million (or fifty percent of the profits) and my book would have been all over the news.

Live and learn.

The Peso Finds a New Casa

I may have had the PESO for two years? Help me, girls, to remember how long it's been since a weekend in Mexico had a group of six women tossing around a peso every time a bad joke escaped our lips. Wait, were they "bad" jokes or merely tasteless? (I can't remember that either). I do remember they were darn clever and I had the last one of the weekend so I got to keep the peso.

Well, last night I brought the peso to the party in my back pocket, and I willingly gave it up to the better pool players. Just before the stroke of midnight, the new recipient sunk exactly the right ball to deserve peso ownership.

Way to get behind that eight-ball, Beav. Love ya! Now take care of our precious peso. It's worth a hellofa lot!

Local Author Pens Another Winner

By Joyce Laabs
Features Editor

Summer resident Michele Van Ort Cozzens, who with her husband, Mike, owns and operates the Sandy Point Resort in Lac du Flambeau, has written another winner.

It's Not Your Mother's Bridge Club (McKenna Publishing Group) is set in the Rattlesnake Valley, a desert community in southern Arizona. (The Cozzens make their winter home in Tucson).

It’s the story of the members of "The Snake Eyes Dice Club" - eight middle-aged women who try to meet monthly to play Bunko. For many in the club this represents their only social outing.

The members: Sylvia, Brandy, Tootsie, Chloe, Amanda, Blanca, Tara and the narrator of all that happens, Shonah.

Members take turns hosting the monthly meetings, and preparing is quite a production in itself. There are also rules: No men or children allowed; and no drink counters.

The reader sees each woman evolve as they meet the challenges in their lives. We learn of their joys and frustrations through their own words.

Although Cozzens has been a member of a bunko group in Arizona for several years, she insists the ladies of the Snake Eyes Dice Club, are all products of her imagination - and that is good - for most members of the club border on dysfunctional - but perhaps if you dig deep enough in any person's life you will find most dysfunction in some area.

We loved the book, and empathized with each and every member of the club; and what a diverse group - from the very wealthy to just making ends meet - from obsessively scheduled to "living free" - from social drinker to alcoholic - they all had their unique characteristics.

Through their conversations at bunko parties and intimate thoughts on their relationships with members of the club, revealed by Cozzens' pen, the women come alive, and you will probably recognize someone you know.

Shonah, whose childhood friend founded the club, gave up her journalistic dreams when she married, but keeps a piece of it alive as a columnist for the local newspaper. Each chapter begins with a quote from her column titled "The Dice Club Chronicles."

I'm not sure I would have liked to have been a member of this particular bunko club - much too stressful for what is supposed to be a fun night with the girls - but it makes for a really great read.

There is another plus - you learn bunko.

The 240-page soft cover book sells for $19.95, and can be purchased at the gift shop at Sandy Point Resort or through amazon.com.

Five dollars from the sale of each book are donated to "Bunko for Breast Cancer" chapters across America for the Breast Cancer Research Foundation.

Cozzens is a soccer mom, jewelry-designer and resort owner; married to the man of her dreams. They have two daughters, and as we said, divide their time between Northern Wisconsin and Tucson, Ariz.

Joyce Laabs can be reached at
features@lakelandtimes.com

Showbiz Kidz Danz Bunco Fundraiser

Are you looking for a chance to win $1,000? This is a fun opportunity for bunco enthusiasts to play the game they enjoy, raise money for a talented group of kids, meet new people and have fun!

The nonprofit group ShowBiz Kidz Danz Booster Club is hosting a Bunco Championship in Tucson on Saturday, June 27 at 3:00 p.m. Entry fee is $25 and the grand prize for the dice-rolling champion is $1,000. There will be live entertainment, food and drinks available.

If you don’t know how to play bunco, organizer Kathy Renteria is offering a “Bunco Bootcamp” at 2:45. Since bunco is one of the easiest games to learn, boot camp won’t be a painful experience. If you can count to six, you can play bunco.

The event takes place at the Junior League, 2099 E. River Road, just east of the intersection of River and Campbell.

 

According to Renteria, ShowBiz Kidz Danz is a community dance program offering more than 40 classes in pom, hip-hop, ballet, jazz, technique, break dancing, lyrical, tap and competitive dance teams. "Moms" classes such as strength and conditioning, adult hip hop and “praise” dance classes are also available.

ShowBiz began in 2001 and currently has some 400 students. “The owner, Jennifer Barton, can name every single one of those 400 students,” says Renteria. Mrs. Barton is also the dance instructor at Marana High School and has over 19 years of teaching experience. She prides herself in offering quality instruction at a lower price and provides scholarships to those in need.

“It is our belief that all children who want to dance should have the opportunity,” says Renteria. “It's not just about dance. It's about lifelong friendships, the confidence that dancers build, teamwork, responsibility and dedication.”

Reminds me a bit of what it’s like to be part of a bunco group.

 

Showbiz Kidz Danz is located at 6906 Camino Martin, Tucson, AZ. It has two small lobbies and four rehearsal studios. The main dance studio features over 1,000 square feet of hardwood floors with 8-foot mirrors along one side. Other rooms are available for tap and ballet. There is also a small homework room for the students to study in between dance classes.

According to Renteria, the Bunco Championship fundraiser on June 27 will help with competition fees, costumes and traveling expenses for dancers. They travel to Phoenix and California for monthly competitions and are hoping to travel to Florida, Texas or Las Vegas for other competitions.

Vendor booths at the event include: Avon, Partylite Candles, Gold Canyon Candles, Lia Sophia Jewelry, Sashay Jewelry, Gift Basket Creations, Amparo's jewelry, Pampered Chef, Arbonne Health and Wellness, Natural Health Chair Massages and more.

For more information contact Kathy Renteria at kathyrenteria@comcast.net

The Oro Valley Book Club: A Class Act

Last week I had the pleasure of being a guest of the "Book Group Ladies" of Oro Valley, AZ. They chose It's Not Your Mother's Bridge Club as their monthly selection after seeing a review in the Arizona Daily Star. Since this book club is also a bunko group, how could they resist?

It was an hour drive to get there and I was happy to arrive and find out they actually liked the book. I had a feeling they wouldn't have asked me to come if they hated it, right? I was also pleased to meet a woman in the group who went to the same elementary and high schools as I back in the Chicago-area. We were about five years apart, so we didn't attend the schools at the same time; however, we had a lot of fun talking about who we had in common. I thought it was extra fun to have recognized all the names in her mother's bridge club!

The discussion was stimulating and thought-provoking and they spoke about the characters like they knew them. Their questions were insightful and intelligent. It was everything a good book group discussion should be. Their bonus was, however, getting some of the inside scoop about my writing process, and I was delighted to share this information.

Perhaps the funniest thing one of the women said was that her husband rarely if ever pays attention to the books she reads. "But he noticed this one," she said. "It's that book with the big fake boobs on the cover."

Uh, yes. About those boobs. I let them go on for a bit and got the impression they all agreed they were fake. Eventually, I chimed in and delivered the old Seinfeld line: "They're real and they're spectacular." 

I like when this topic comes up because it gives me the opportunity to talk about the fundraising we're doing for Breast Cancer Research. Because of all the comments on the big boobs on this book cover, and because there are eight women in the story (and one of eight women is diagnosed with breast cancer) I have been donating profits from book sales to various Breast Cancer Research organizations, including Bunko for Breast Cancer.

And now the Oro Valley Group has joined this cause. Today I received a lovely note from the ladies of the club:

Dear Michele,
On behalf of the Oro Valley Book Group you visited May 7, we would love to make a donation to Breast Cancer Research or another charity of your choosing. Thank you so much it was a real treat to meet you and we all loved the discussion. Thanks so much for your time.

All the best,
Paige Coghall and "the Book Group Ladies"

Included was a generous check, which I will promptly relay to The Breast Cancer Research Foundation, Bunco For Breast Cancer Bunco group, Tempe, AZ.

Thank you, ladies. Attending your meeting was my pleasure and your donation is truly appreciated. You're a class act.

Oprah and the Hot Pink Connection

Mary Beth had her Oprah day yesterday. She wore a hot pink shirt to the show, and was very pleased to see Oprah wearing a hot pink dress. Hot pink is clearly the hot color for spring.

“I sat in the second row,” said my sister, “and I swear Oprah looked right at me a couple of times. She really connected.”

I think it was the hot pink connection.

Meanwhile, I learned that Oprah no longer (if she ever did) shakes the hands of her audience members. So, aside from the eye contact, there wasn’t a direct connection, and certainly no comment on Mary’s outfit or her jewelry. Further, audience members are required to sign some kind of confidentiality agreement or exploitation waiver, indicating they won’t use Oprah’s name to endorse personal products or services.

This is completely understandable. I mean, if the World Bunco Association can hold supplemental rights to the word “bunco” and attempt to block the use of this word in book titles, I’m quite sure Oprah and her people were wise enough to obtain primary rights to the word “Oprah.”


The back-story on this is about my second novel, It’s Not Your Mother’s Bridge Club. It’s NOT the first name I had for this book. The working title was, The Bellisimo Valley Bunco Squad. I wanted “bunco” in the title because, well, it’s a story about a group of women who play the dice game bunco. But when my publisher sent an endorsement request to the World Bunco Association, he received anything but an endorsement. What he received was a terse, cease and desist order.

Looking for a win-win, we attempted to work with the World Bunco Association, however, when it requested 50% of the revenue from book sales, we ultimately decided to change the title and be done with that. We changed the title and we changed the spelling from bunco (with a c) to bunko (with a k). What’s in a name? It’s still a story about women who play with dice.

Anyway, there will be no “As Seen on Oprah” endorsement for my jewelry, regardless of whether or not Mary Beth gets her beautiful, hot-pink clad mug on TV when the program airs. (May 12, 2009). It’s enough for me to know that Mary made her personal connection with this bigger-than-life celebrity.

On second thought, I wonder if I can change the spelling and use Mary Beth’s original Facebook announcement: “As Seen on Opra?”

Nah. I think that might alert the Chicago Bunco Squad.

Sable Lit Reviews Gives It's Not Your Mother's Bridge Club 5/5 Sable Seals

Sable Lit Reviews is a website focusing on "all things multicultural in lit, media and history. A review of It's Not Your Mother's Bridge Club posted today with five of five "Sable Seals." Here is the review:

In Michele Van Ort Cozzens’ It’s Not Your Mother’s Bridge Club, we meet eight amazing women who live, love and laugh in the heart of southern Arizona over monthly games of Bunko. At first, you wonder if you’ll spend the entire read flipping back to the first chapter where Van Ort Cozzens first introduces us to these complex women, but before long the reader will recognize the distinct personalities of these women. While I didn’t have a favorite Bunko babe, I really grew to appreciate these women as a whole unit. As the book progresses, these women do become more of a unit each filling in for the short-comings and complimenting the strengths of the others—sometimes unconsciously. This story doesn’t just weave the story of a series of monthly women’s nights out and their Bunko blow-outs. We get a snapshot of each woman’s life leading up to the well-deserved Bunko nights with the girls where the strictest rules are “No men. No kids. And No drink counters”.

The author flawlessly gives Blanca—the Hispanic and African-American model, art saleswoman and single mom, Shonah—the newspaper columnist, Tara—the pottery artist, Tootsie—the former golf pro, Chloe—the former nurse and full-time mom, Amanda—the paralegal, Sylvia—the kind yet pampered lawyer’s wife, and Brandy—the physical therapist and mother of five, her own voice. These women fight, love, drink and laugh like a real group of woman friends do. Not just a chick novel, Van Ort Cozzens’ introduces great conflict and suspense-building making this woman’s fiction novel an enjoyable journey. It’s Not Your Mother’s Bridge Club earns five out of five Sable Seals.

Bunko: It's Not Your Mother's Bridge Club

Do You Play Bunko?

Even if you don't belong to a bunko group, you may have heard of this dice game played by MILLIONS of American women each month. It's no secret that this game is so simple that the only brain requirement is you know how to count to 21. The main physical requirement is that you know how to roll dice.

What may be a secret, however, is that women who belong to bunko groups don't go to the monthly gatherings just to play the game. The main reason they go is to connect with the women in their group. Anyone looking for a way to get through the challenges of daily life will benefit by sharing stories (and rolling dice) with friends. Learning you're not alone is the most valuable gift women can give to one another.

Join a bunko group. You won't be sorry.

For Your Book Club

Per your requests we have provided relevant questions about the book, the characters and the dynamics of women's groups to help jump start your book club discussions. CLICK HERE.